Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Do you think I should think twice about getting married over this?

So I am a social worker and am all for fighting for and helping those who are oppressed and need help. I have had several arguments with my fiance because he feels completely different than I do. I am very passionate about what I chose to do in life and he doesn't respect it and at times I just want to not talk to him after our discussions. I know that no couple will ever be completely similar and if so it would be boring in a way but is this too much difference? For one, I support gay people and think they should have equal rights, and he is completely against it. Another argument we had was about how I feel the system keeps minorities just where they want them as well as homeless. He feels it is there fault for being in the situation they are in without taking poverty, abuse, neglect, substance abuse into consideration. Another thing is that close to where I live I always see cops pulling over minorities for no reason and so I was telling him how unfair it was to profile them and he went off about how they deserve it being that he is a minority himself. He is so arrogant and thinks he knows it all and is always right. My question is, where would this go? Will I be able to live a life with him when we have such different views and how can I be with someone who has no empathy for the population I work with AND also does not understand why I do it. I was a victim of domestivc violence which is what motivated me to get my MSW and he feels it is the victims fault for staying again without taking in consideration the reasons why, fear, legal status, lack of resources or knowledge of it, fear of losing the kids, threats etc. What do you think?

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